Lets see right now im down to like 3 guys… Pool Boy, Mr Mexican and Shrimpy.

Other than that i have had guys ive talked to this summer, one in particular who almost got ahold of my heart, thank God he didnt, cause it would be squashed right now. Because he ended up taking off, without telling me what happened at all, and started back talking to a chick from his past(who i am half cool with) smh

Anywho back to the present guys….

Pool Guy: Ive known him since freshman year…and he has flirte with me since day one. But since he is a flirt i never take him seriously. But within the last year he has been trying to show me that he is for real about me. But my problem is, i dont know if i am for real about him. Sometimes i let him take me out, or hang out with him(we always have fun). I think he is really cute, i like the way he dresses, he treats me well. But *sigh* its something that keeps me from giving him my all. Maybe because there is no chase. I have no clue, but i do like him, but i also cant stand things about him. Like how he eats….or how overly freaky he is. I always say, if the feelings r there they r there, if they arent then i cant force them. But im not gonna count him out. We will see.

Okay so the dilemma of the moment is lets call him Mr Mexican: Me and Mr Mexican have been talking on and off for about 4 or 5 months. The first time we started talking it was great, we went out on dates, i met his friends, we chilled, and just all around had a good time with eachother. I started to really like him and thought i could see myself in a relationship with him. But all of sudden he got ghost, stopped contacting me all together. I was so confused, because i felt like everything was going well, no problems. But anyway, i can take a hint. I left him alone and moved on, but while i was talking to the Twitter guy he tried to come back in the picture and tell me i needed to stop playing. Then he started to ask to see me alot but i always blew him off, so he kinda backed off. But then when i stopped talking to Twitter i realized that Mr Mexican was the guy…i really liked him…he has alot of the qualities in a guy, and i dont think i can name one thing he does that gets on my nerves, well maybe his textng etiquette, but thats it. Everything else i like, i actually told him this. I told him to his face that he was exactly my type, to the T. I told him this the other night, we actually had a really nice convo, wake up the next day, leave and i havent really heard from him since then. SMH

       The thing is im so confused and TORN(currently listening to Letoya Luckett)!!! I have always said if i ever found a guy who treated me the way the Jerk did, then i wanted nothing to do with him. But the thing is, my feelings and emotions r already invested in this situation. I want to leave so bad and never look back, but its better said than done. I dont wanna let go just yet, i want him to realize that im right for him and that he should be with me. ugghhhh I should have done a whole blog for solely him…lol smh.

      He doesnt do anything serious, only things like go days without talking to me, or not texting back when i text him. But i have told him numerous times, i DONT like that. If we r talking, then i want to talk. If i go more than 3 days without talking to u, i consider u a person of the past. But he does this often and claims this is just who he is as a person, okay F ALL THAT!!! i dont condone lol…..anywho i have no CLUE what to do. I really like him, we havent even had sex yet. lol…*sigh*

Where should i start?? Hmmm well i guess i can fill u in on guys from my past who r still very much present.

The Friend Zone Guy: We r still very much friends, even better now than before. Of course i still have feelings for him, but we r good, i give him more freedom. I even recently started talking to one of his close friends(his roomate). But he will always be my friend, whether we end up together or not. *shrugs*

The Jerk Guy: I havent talked to him in about 6 months and counting. Im giving myself a pat on the back as we speak cause thank God i got away from that hot mess. He was bad news.

Okay now back to present life, i am still basically on a mission to find someone to be serious about and with. And  have been kinda sorta looking all over. Even on twitter…lmao sad i know…

BUT i actually found a guy…we were first just friendly on Twitter, then we one day exchanged numbers and started talking all day and all night. We grew sooo close within weeks of talking. We actually talked about relocating to be with eachother. We looked up engagement rings, talked about ours lives together. We even had an arguement and he sent flowers to my house. I just KNEW i was in love………then slowly but surely i fell out of whatever this was i was in. And eventually i stopped talking to him. I felt bad for doing him this way, but i cant help my feelings and i wont force them.

I DONT KNOW WHAT IT WRONG WITH ME!!! lol

For the last year I have really been on the search for the perfect guy, the guy who could possibly be my husband….A few times I feel as though I have gotten close then they happened to get away somehow(maybe that means they weren’t meant to be cause everything happens for a reason) Some were here for a reason and a season….lol

Some great qualities I found were:
*Jerk, I love a guy who can tell me to shut up and sit down(even though I’m not going to, its the thought that counts)
*Funny, every girl LOVES a guy who can honestly make her laugh….not just giggle….
*Caring, who doesn’t want to be told they r beautiful once in a while….or to get a back rub every now and then and it not always end up with clothes coming off…lol
*Thoughtful, remembering the little things goes a long way….
*Honest, lying just complicates things(i met one guy who I thought was perfect for me who was a little too honest, don’t tell me u r seeing other chicks and expect me to say ok cool)
*Can drive, I HATE guys who can’t whip the whip…ugghhh….lol I know I’m weird, but that’s what makes me, me….we all have little things we hate….hey…
*Can dress, is it too much to ask to find a guy who knows how to throw an outfit together? I shouldn’t have to look for a Kappa(they r known for good taste in clothing) to find a dude….non greek should dress too!! dag…..

that’s all I can think of right now…i guess that was my list of what I want in a guy…..

I have found that in a few guys, but it always seems to go wrong…..so I was thinking do I mess situations up or find little things wrong with guys to purposely get out of that situation with that guy??? hmmmmm…idk….i feel as if I do, and that’s bad….cause everyone has flaws and I don’t think I will ever find a guy who will meet every standard that i have. But then again, should i settle for someone whose flaw gets under my skin. Because there have been guys who had flaws and i overlooked them, because i liked him so much.

But at the end of the day i dont really know what i want…….I just went on a date with a great guy. He was nice, he remembered things about me, he was attractive, he dressed nice, he was a gentleman, and he still was sort of a jerk, and he made me seriously laugh…..but at the end of the night….i didnt kiss him…and i dont think i like him like that….its weird….he is what i say im looking for…..but there r not really any sparks….flames…fireworks….idk….so it throws it off…….a guy i know i like is someone that, when we r together i never want to leave or him to leave me. I have found a few guys like that….but not many…..hmmmm

So maybe i do know what i want….and i havent found it…..or maybe i have….and let him get away….uggghhhh….my heart is toooo confused right now……

ok…thats all for now….

just had a thought so im back…lol

so i was just talking to my friend and we were saying how this year we were going to get serious about guys. If they arent talking about a relationship then they can keep moving….hell if they arent talking about dating then they can keep it moving….lol…but anywho i was talking and i think i want an Oxymoron boyfriend….

In the past i have always dated or talked to guys who dressed real preppy like and who were pretty boys…..but i realized that I tend to like the personality of “hard type” of guys. Guys who ride motorcycles and can pick me up. Or a guy who can lift the heavy stuff in the house. Because if i can do it and u cant, thats weak, and i will definitely be turned off!!!! I get turned off SUPER quick, so i need someone who can keep me turned on, and being weak is horrible…..therefore i want an OXYMORON!! lol…pretty but hard….

We would call eachother after each class and walk together, we would go to the library together, and I would go over his house and help him with his homework. I would also go to his job and just chill with him while he was working, everyone there thought i was his girlfriend. On my birthday he bought me a cake and took me out for brunch. It was too cute. I sent him a Christmas gift, i bought him something for Valentines day, and for his birthday i gave him some money and 2 birthday cards(they were toooooo cute). But through it all i was super confused, we would flirt and get jealous if we saw eachother with other people, but we never did anything physical. We never even kissed. It was weird, he always said he was at a point in his life where he wouldnt want to bring a girlfriend into his situation, but he did have some “busted babies” lol….i just wasnt one of them(i wouldnt allow myself to be anyway).

So after a while i just started calling him my best friend, and he agreed that i was his also, because we were closer than just regular friends. But at the beginning of this summer i got up courage to ask him a question that had been bothering me……

I told him that i really liked him and wanted to be more than friends(not sexually) and he told me straight up that he came to see me as just a friend. I said okay and built a bridge(got over it)………We continued as best friends, and a couple of weeks ago one of my friends(we just really became friends) asked about him and said he was cute. I put her on, and they started talking. Now my feeling have never changed for him, but since he is my best friend i want him to be happy. So i let him talk to her, and put my feelings aside.

Okay so yesterday he invited me to one of his friends “Sets”(a house party) and i mean, he has invited me to plenty of sets, some others, some his own. But we havent been to one since he has started kinda talking to my friend or since i asked him if he liked me. So i dont know, i was thinking that maybe it would be different….but….it wasnt. It felt the exact same, at every party we have ever been at together, we seem to gravitate towards eachother and flirt all night. And this time was the exact same, we flirted all night on a wall. But since we r strictly friends now i asked about one of his friends.

I asked him was his friend, “Kap”  single and he said yeah he was, and asked if the girl i came with had asked about his friend…..I was like uhhhhh no, then he asked was it me, i of course said no. And he said i better not had, cause he didnt give me the green light to talk to any of his friends and that I gave him the green light for my friend. So after this i am super confused, and i was like u dont like me, thats not fair, we talked about this and we r just friends, so u should not care. But he did….but after talking about it for a few minutes, he finally said he was playing and that I could talk to him and that he would put me on……sigh….now i am really confused.

Im thinking he just doesnt want me to think that he cares. But why?? Does he like me or doesnt he? I know he doesnt want a girlfriend, and maybe he is thinking if we started talking then i would want a relationship with him(which i probably would lol)…..but why pass up a good thing, a person who is willing to be beside u when u r going through hard times…..idk, im just confused.

Then at other times i think that maybe it is a sign from God, telling me that we arent meant to be(wow, just while writing this i had an epiphany, maybe it is a sign that we r meant to be together in the future, because it is said that ur husband will be someone who u have not been physical with, so maybe that is why God is not allowing us to get that close, hmmmmm)…..but anywho, I believe other signs we shouldnt be together is the fact that he flirts with ALOT of girls(im super jealous), he had chicks at the party all over him before he came to talk to me. He also always seems to be broke and asks can he borrow money….I dont mind giving if i have it, but i feel like if im with a man, he should be supporting me, not the other way around. That really irks me……

So i guess my question now is…….Why do u think he wont admit he likes me? Or does he like me? Should i sit down and ask him about it again? IM CONFUSED!!!!!!!!! AGGGGGHHHHH

UPDATE!!!!!

So today i went to his job to return some stuff and he was there. He made a few jokes and we started walking and talking. He kept saying he was cooking that night…so i was like do u have a date or something. He said no and that he was cooking for himself….Blah blah whatever……then he asked if i was gon come over to eat, i said yeah knowing he was full of crap….but later i texted him and asked was he still cooking and could i come watch…he said yeah….

So i get there….and he got on the sexy music….in there cooking fried chicken, cornbread, corn and green beans….If that isnt the cutest thing ever!!! lol….so he makes room for me to sit on the counter to watch, as he proceeds to cook and dance at the same time, while causing me to slightly fall in love with him!! ugghhh….so we start talking and i tell him i have a date…he asks about it and some how we get on the “niggas aint shit convo” and he says y just cause they dont want a relationship?? wow….so thats what it is…..hmmm

He later bursts out with he needs to settle down but cant find the right chick…then he says well maybe i have and dont know it….hmmmm….he says he is picky and cant deal with chicks with flaws…..so i ask what r my flaws….he stops…stands there and looks at me and then says……..None…u dont have any….seriously…and ur next questions is, then y wont i be in a relationship with u?……lol

Actually my question was……so y am i in the friend zone right now??…and he says because in the past he has become super close friends with girls then end up taking it further and it always ruins the friendship in the end…..But i think if it was a real friendship nothing can break that….He says if its meant to be it is meant to be…..He also says he doesnt even remember telling me that he only likes me as a friend…..hmmmmm now im super confused…..

So now we r letting things happen as they may….idk….i wanna be with him….but idk…again…im confused….

P.S….the food was GREAT!!! and not just cause i like him…it really was good!!! wow…and he can cook….*sigh*

One that really stood out to me was the 3 month rule, about sex. He compared  it to him working at the Ford Plant when he was younger, and as a new hire he didnt get any benefits. And the older guys who had been there longer would tell him that he wasnt really working or “about anything” if he wasnt getting the benefits. But, the thing was, in order to get the benefits, he had to work the job for 3 months…..he had to show up, come to work on time, and do what was asked of him, to show that he really wanted to be there. Steve stated that, if a job can ask for all these requirements before giving the benefits, why didnt we women do the same?

The power of the “P” is always talked about. And my own philosophy has been, girls control whether or not u all have sex, but the guy controls whether or not u end up in a relationship…..But as of lately i feel as though i have been stripped of all my power. If i guy doesnt want a relationship, u cant change his mind. And if u with hold sex, trust me, there r plenty of “going” chicks out there that will give it to him. So its like u r damned if u do(they stop talking to u) and damned if u dont(they move on to the next)

So i have come to the conclusion that i am no longer going to let guys control things that i should have a say in. I have come to a place in my life(even my mama told me) where i need to start looking for Mr Right, not Right Now, im done with the pimp thing, im done playing games….so i made a few rules, nothing too big…

1. If u arent even thinking about a relationship in the NEAR future, keep it moving buddy, dont waste my time or urs…

2. No more house dates, if u not trying to go out or be out the house, go “chill” with someone else…….news flash, we know what kick it at the house and watch movies means by now…..duh…and dont try the “i dont really like going out alot, i just like chilling at the house” crap either….blah blah…..NEXT

3. If u dont feel the need to atleast text me everyday to see if i am still breathing, then u must not care….but the new rule is….im going to put it in ur hands….if u text i will text back, but i will NOT hound u….

4. If u feel like ur boys r more important than getting to know me, then by all means, go be with the boys. But dont expect me to sit around and wait for u to come back. My friends and i always say, u make time for the things u want to make time for. U make time for the gym, or to play basketball, or the “game”, so y not me? If u dont have time….dont waste mine…

5. The famous 3 month rule….Steve Harvey said, if he likes u….he will wait….so therefore if u like me…and u plan on being here awhile, u should have no prob. waiting. Im not saying we may not have the bomb connection and it be quicker than 3 months, but basically know….u WILL be waiting…..

6. And last but not least is….No more trying to find a guy…my friends know that im usually the one thats like, i like him, im going to get him. I get most of them, but they never seem to work out. And it is said that the husband finds the wife. So from now on im chilling, im not going after any guys, if u want my number then hey…..come see if u can have it(no pun)…lol

Anyway……..girls, let me know what u think of the rules….r they attainable? what should be added? would u think about setting these rules in ur own life???

So its this chicks blog who i look at consistently and I decided i was going to kinda take a page from her book and list my guys…..lol….right now i have been on kind of a spiritual path so its not many but here we go….

Friend Zone: Uhhhh im not sure if i can even count him. Its this guy who i have been cool with for some time now, he is cool as ever but he it not really my type. And his personality is cool, but not cool enough to make me just like him like him. He is super nice, we have hung at his house and gone out. He gives me compliments all the time, on my hair and just always says something about me being fine(and i tell him to stop cause im uncomfortable with compliments…lol)…..but for now we r keeping him in the friend zone.

Freak or Not a Freak: So last summer i started messaging this guy on facebook, he went to school a couple hours away but was from the city im in, so whatever. So we just texted and messaged really and somehow we fell off. So recently i was in walmart and i see this cutie, and im like ooooo he is cute. So he comes up to me and asks does he know me from somewhere.(I mean im kind of a big deal, so im like from campus? from facebook???) then he was like yeah!!! facebook, asked my name, blah blah. So we realized it was eachother, so we said it was good to finally meet and kept it moving. But he added me on facebook a couple of days later and sent me a message. We have been texting lately, and the other day he texted me and said he wanted to lick the rain off of me…..uhhhh what?? negro i dont know u like that….ha….so now im thinking that maybe his overly freaky ways r wat turned me off last summer? idk we will see how he bounces back from this…..………….UPDATE!!!!: so the other day i told him i didnt do house dates anymore, he said it was dumb and i havent heard from him since then….lol…no wonder y i stopped talking to his dumb butt before!!  UPDATE 2::: So i saw him at the club and he walked past me 3 times…..negro please, u r too out…so calm all that down….

Tha Cable Guy: Okay so when i was leaving home to come back to school this summer i met this cool guy at the gas station. He worked for Comcast, lol(hey atleast he got a job). So on the way up here we talked the whole time and he seemed super cool, and ready to be serious in life. This man asked me that night if we could commit to only talking to eachother and me being the pimp i am is like un un, i dont know u like that to just drop everybody else. U could decide u hate my personality tomo or something. Or the same for me with u. So no, anyway i think he got mad. We talked a couple of more times then he got ghost. So like 2 days ago he called me and was like where u been? He says he lost my number, and was mad i never hit him up. So we will see if he continues to keep making contact.(He kinda crazy anyway, so i dont know if i want him to, lol)

Off Limits Maybe??: So like an hour ago this guy messaged me on facebook(i secretly liked him) but i thought he still had a gf, he threw in there that he was looking for a new chick…so i was like hmmmm….he is friends with my last summer fling(he was really my boo, lol) so im like u r off limits…so right now we just, like 5 mins ago, exchanged numbers and r setting up a date….wow….wtf….we will see how this goes….with my news rules…..next blog is about my new found rules!!!!…………………….UPDATE: So off limits has been hittin me up alot, asked me to happy hour on tomo(friday) but i will be at work, but anywho…..he has been asking me to come chill at his apt…and i was gon go, but i started feeling bad(dizzy and stuff) so i had to lay down….he told me to still come but drive slow(negro r u retarded??) so he begged for like 2 hours, i didnt go, but the next day i planned to. i got in the area and called and he didnt seem to enthused……oh so now u wanna act funny, un un, i aint going…so i think i may cut him out for good….ugh UPDATE 2:::: I happened to talk to him yesterday and ended up going to visit after the club. He was a total gentleman….we kissed alot and *whispers*He was a great kisser….i fell asleep there and we woke up and watched cartoons…it was nice….we just chilled…he may be back in…lol

The Older Guy: So this guy is 25, i never thought he would even be on the list. He is….sigh….my friends cousins friend. I met him through the cousin. We started off emailing(what type of old head stuff??) then he asked for the digits, lol…and we started texting every once in a while. And yesterday we chilled and talked for like 6 or 7 hours. It was one of the best convos i have ever had. Plus he looked sooooo darn sexy with his Rick Ross thing going on…oooooo lol…but anyway we texted today and he asked me on a date for when he comes back into town….Its not even until like 10 days from now, and im already excited thinking about clothes and whatnot….lol…idk we will see….

So like i said im on my spiritual thing right now…on some real let ur husband find u type of stuff. So i have been trying to not be my regular forward self, by stepping to guys. I just been falling back, and hoping one will come to me. So we will see…….sigh

The Friend of a Friend: So i have a problem with seeing a cute guy on facebook and letting them know that i think they r cute…lol, so i see this guy on my old neighbors pictures an wrote on the pic that he was cute, and needed to come to the city. Lol, so from there we added eachother and started  sending  messages and just chatting.

I met him my freshman year in college and at first i thought, he is soooo not my type, he is too short. I dont do short guys. But he ended up pursuing me, andit kinda turned me on that he went out of his way to find me, and to talk to me. So i gave him a chance and we started talking. He took me for ice cream and we chilled at his house. But we didnthang out much cause he would do things like……..tell me we were going out, then stand me up. It got so bad that, i would get dressed and be sitting on my bed, my roomate would leave the room and come back 2 hours later and she would automatically ask, u must be going out with “The Jerk”??? And it never failed, he mostly always stood me up, but i guess i just liked a challenge, or someone who wasnt crazy about me. Because i continued to allow him to treat me like this. We argued about his actions constantly, but in the end we always ended up talking again.

We had sooo many on and off periods, But through all of it, i never once “cheated” if u know what i mean on him. I was sooooo in love with his jerk ass…..I let him get away with murder and made excuses for him. It was horrible. I even got to a point where i felt like we were secret lovers. Like we didnt really speak or talk in public. But after a while i kinda felt like he thought i wasnt good enough to be seen with him or to be known as his chick. He actually made me feel bad about myself(and some people will tell u that i am one of the most conceited people ever, lol, i mean imnot like dammnn, but im super cute ya know, i get plenty of guys). Anyway on one of our off periods he started hanging with this other chick, and i would see them together at events on campus and even at clubs, so that really blew me away. Like wow, u can be with her and not me???? Thats some straight bull

When i tell u i have cried over this man toooo many times to count and sooo many times i have told him to lose my number, never call me again, this is ur last chance and dont talk to me ever. But after every time he would come back with his smooth talking and apologies and snatch me right back up.

So here is the thing, I have been told i date like a guy, moving from one guy to the next quickly, but im really the type of chick who wants that one guy. It just has to be THAT guy and not just any guy. So with The Jerk i went from wanting a relationship with him, to just wanting to talk exclusively, to just wanting to talk, to just wanting to be with him. He has made me downgrade my values and principles so much that i started to take anything he was giving out. Another rule i had was, i would NEVER talk to a guy with a baby, but my sophomoreyear he found out he had a 3 month old daughter, and me being the chick that was sooooo in love with him, decided i didnt care. Can u believe that? I continued to talk to this dude when he found out he had a kid, thats not the Me that i know….lol

And of course every so often he would come to me with this im ready to settle down and i want it to be with u bulls***. I would accept him back then all of a sudden the settle down went out the window. His latest B.S. run was this summer. I wasnt at school for the summer, i went home andhe messaged me on some, “What would u do if i asked u to be my girlfriendright now??” I was dumbfounded, i even packed my things up and came back to school for the weekend to talk about it face to face. I planned to see him all weekend(while staying at a friends house) and over course same ol JERK as always, he blew me off for 85% of the trip. I saw him one day and when i tell u we had the best talk ever. About us and the future and where we would go. I asked him questions i had needed to get off my chest for 3 years now.

He answered them all, whole heartedly. He said i WAS his type(contrary to my belief that i wasnt), and i interested him, and he could see himself being with me, basically all the things i wanted to hear. I spent the night andexpected to spend the day….but the next morning he got up at 8 o clock and started getting ready. I was soooo confused, he said he had to run some errands…..I was like r u crazy??? do u know i drove 4 hours to see u??? and do u know what this mans answer was????????

he said,” U came to see me, but i cant just lay in the bed with u all day. i got more important things to do”…………………………………………………………………wow…………………………………..thats all i could think. I didnt even get mad, how could i? After 3 years i knew how his stupid self was and he wasnt going to change over night….so….i said goodbye(in the nicest way ever) and i left. I ended up coming back to town, cause home wasnt cutting it. And we ended up chilling and talking and going over things we had done wrong and what needed to change. He said he wanted a gf type of relationship but still with no title. Me still being dumb in love said okay….

But where he crossed the line was when he said he wanted to continue to talk to others…..wat i look like? dumb…well, dont answer that, lol…but no i wasnt going for that. So i gave him an ultimatum, ”I love u and want to be with u, s0 either u be in a relationship with me or u be without me. Im walking and when i leave i dont expect to EVER come back”……this time there would be no, wait 2 months then swoop back in my life….some guys were just not meant to be tied down, and i was no longer going to try to tie him down. So i left, and im happy about my decision. Its the smartest thing i have done since i met him in the student center freshman year.

He is the type of guy who gets to u, so that u will never forget him. I will never forget him, we had some good times. But we had waaayyyy more bad times than good. So anytime i ever think of him, i think about the bad times and that makes me erase whatever message i was going to send. I dont need that kind of guy in my life…I like jerk but…….i dont like that much jerk….so he is officially in my past and should never be confused with being any type of future guy.

So i have always been the type of chick who changes my guy like i change my panties, haha. Since high school(i am now a college senior) i have dated and talked to numerous guys, too many to even count. Mind you, talking and dating does NOT consist of anything sexual, maybe a kiss, cause once again i am a kissing slut. So basically in my life there have only been like 3 guys who have caught my attention enough for me to want to keep them in my life. One in high school(who i dated for a year and we still occasionally kick it), and the other 2 i met my freshman year in college. While one i was romantically involved with treated me like a jerk, the other guy who i was strictly friends with was really good to me.

I believe these particular guys have stayed around for so long because……

1) High school love: he knows how to treat me. We go on dates, he can put it down(well now, cause in high school:whomp whomp, lol), he knows what makes me tick, he knows how to piss me off and 2 seconds later how to make it better. He like so completes me. Cause i do the same with him. Like together we have no inhibitions, its weird. I will always love him no matter what, and if he ever got his life together maybe we could be together forever, we always say that no matter what we gon get married in the future. awwwww

2) Jerk on and off for 3 yrs guy: So i met him my freshman year of college and he changed my outlook on guys i talked to. He was short and just….not my type. He was a cutie….just….not my usual type….okay so anyway, like a week later he found me on facebook and hit me up. We started talking and he soooo drew me in. i was head over heels for him, we went on a couple of dates and hung out alot. He was in a fraternity, so he went out alot, and had alot of groupies. So that was kind of a turn off, but there was just something about him that kept me. But he was not ready for a relationship(still isnt) so we never officially got together, i even cut off all other guys for a year for him, even on our periods when we didnt talk…..we had a lot of those….okay i have to stop cause i could go on forever about him…basically, i gave him an ultimatum, either be a relationship with me, or go away…lol…he chose to go away.

3) The friendly friend: So when i met this guy it was strictly on some friend type stuff, more like a big brother who i always hung out with. So we hung out constantly, he showed me around the city and took me to dinner(with other people there of course). Everyone on campus thought we went together, guys would be standoffish because they thought he was my man. The thing was, we were bff’s, he talked to chicks and i talked to guys….but…i LIKED him!! im also a liking whore, lol…but it usually fades after a month or so) and i thought it would…But guess what? it didnt…i even got the guts to tell him that i liked him and he told me that he only liked me as a friend(sad face:-(  i know) but oh well…

I thought i had moved on though and i was over him, he just got out of a relationship of 8 months with this cool chick. I know she is cool, because she is now my friend, when they were together i did not know her(she was a transfer) and now that they r not together we r super cool…She tells me about their past and let’s me in on her feelings for him and how she hopes they can one day get back together, cause he was a good man to her. But anywho, today i went on campus and he was there, so i went a chilled with him, then later him and his friends went to play basketball and i went to watch. So he decided he was done playing and came and sat beside me, so one of his friends was like “U know he gotta go cake!!! i invited her for him….he cant never say i didnt throw him no assist”

So im sitting there in shock, like what is he gonna say? what do i do? huh? So i say, un un there was no assist, we just friends, u tripping. So he stayed over there with me, then went to his car to change back into his regular clothes….and yallllllll……..when he stepped back out the car with his polo on and fly sunglasses, i had to pick my mouth up off the floor. He looked sooooooooooooo good….So now i feel like i am sucked back into his spell…I like him again now…but i CANT like him….i am now the friend of the ex..i cant do that to her…but….its not fair(yes i am whining right now) i knew him first!!!! ugghhhh…..dilemmas, dilemmas….lol

So what do u think i should do??? Answers…..i NEED ANSWERS!!!! lol…lol

Okay so i have kinda wanted a blog page for a minute now, but until lately i havent really had a  reason to start one….

So here is the first story of many on my rode to finding love(aww i know, lol):

So i met this guy, we will call him July, I met him in my friends complex and i had seen him around a couple of times, but today we spoke and he asked for my number. First i was soooo confused, cause today out of alllll days i looked HAM!!! lol, i had on work clothes and had just finished swimming, and i have “black” hair, so it looked a mess.

But none the less, he asked for my number, and we started texting right away, just getting to know eachother with the regular questions such as, age, are u in school, what year, where u work? the whole nine. I visited him that same night, and had one of the best first talked ever, and just had to kiss him(im kind of a kissing slut, i feel like the bachelorette, lol) So we kissed and i totally liked him.

So the next day i went swimming again, saw him again. And we started kicking it hard. I was there for him on the anniversary of one of his friends deaths. But through all of this, i started getting little weird signs from him. He would call and plan to hang with me, so i would kick it over my friends house and wait for him to come home, but a few times he stood me up. I immediately told him that, that reminded me of my ex and i did not approve. He apologized and we moved forward.

But then i noticed that we were kinda growing apart, and this was at the same time he kinda started pressuring me about doing the do with him.(I wanted to wait because i recently read the Steve Harvey book) So i called him on it and he just said he had been going through some things and was stressed in life and it wasnt anything dealing with him and I. So i said okay….

After that we had some good times, except for the fact that i felt like a cake mama, I bought him dinner once, then drove all the way to his job and took him lunch, and another time i bought him dinner to his house, he ate it, and then within minutes of me getting there, his brother says they need to grocery shopping and he jumps(he always jumps for his brother, wtf??) and i have to leave. He asks me to come back later….I came back later that night(supposedly we were having pizza and a movie)

We ended up having nothing and nothing….well a movie was playing on tv, does that count???? i think not. Anyway….he starts telling me all this stuff, just opening up about being hurt in his past and not being able to trust people, and how he wanted to start fresh with me and just not think of the past and only see the future. it was literally the cutest thing i had heard in my life. I melted, and things…well they got hot……lol

So later that night we r looking at things on youtube and im like hold on ur username is confusing me, did u lie about ur name????? he says no, my name was taking on here, so i just put up another. I accept that answer and say okay. So while we r sitting there he says he is texting his brother, then he gets a call, he has it loud enough for me to hear, and i hear someone say, “Man u gotta come get me!!” and he says, “Man i told u to take ur car, okay im on my way”

He says that it was his brother and he is drunk downtown and needs to be picked up, wow….r u kidding me?? what a freaking coincidence that u have to leave now…..hmmmm…so i leave, dont even say bye, just leave….He texts me and invites me to lunch the next day, so i feel better….

…………………………………….of course there was no lunch, he invites me over that night though, i go….but only to curse his butt out. I sit in the car waiting on him to get home for about 30 mins, then leave. Its official, he is crazy…i decide to do some investigating, i look on FB and there he is…..different name, different age and school year!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know what u r thinking…….WTF??!! yes, this man lied about  his age and name for almost 2 months. and when i called him on it, he says that was the only thing and can we continue talking…..R U SERIOUS????????? i dont even know u….y would i dare continue this farce of a relationship…u r dumb….wow…days later…..i am still in soooo much shock.

And hurt, and confused, and shocked, and floored that someone could blatantly lie like that….

So my question now is, have u ever lied to someone like this? and why?? or been lied to like this??